THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS: OLD PEOPLE AND WEED

So old people drive slowly. This isn't much of a revelation. It's just true. At least for most old folks. Or at least the ones in Cadillacs. It's partially due to eyesight, partially due to perception (when you're old you probably think things are moving faster than they are), partially due to spine curvature and the decreased distance between foot and pedal that people past 65 experience. People who smoke weed also drive slowly. That's definitely due to changed perception. To make matters super complicated, in states with medical marijuana lots of old people smoke weed! So then what? Is it a double negative? It's not like I see some old people driving slowly and others driving REAAAAALLLLLY slowly. Maybe they don't drive.

I remember one time I was in Philly and this asshole cut me off. I was at a red light and when it turned green this car just went flying in front of me and shot past at like 70 miles an hour. As the car passed, I looked over and much to my surprise, it was an old man! Definitely 70 or older. Usually I'd be pissed if someone cut me off but this time I was actually happy. I had never seen an old driver with such confidence, such bold courage! I felt like anything was possible at that point.

I know that when I'm old I'll drive slowly without realizing it. I'll probably have pride that I'm not driving slowly, but a good look at the speedometer will reveal "14 MPH." This leads me to a slightly different topic. MPH signs. How many different speed limits have I seen signs for?

Definitely 25. And 35. And 55. And 65. And 70. And 75. What in between? 15 MPH in a school zone. In parking lots I think you see 5 and 10 MPH often. I know I've seen a 45 MPH sign once or twice. 40? Perhaps. Not sure. Same with 50 and 30. They probably exist. My sister's old school had a 7 MPH sign. It wasn't a fake looking sign either. It was a real speed limit sign. It just said 7 MPH. That's the best.

Actually this is the best.



The description from where I found this says "The Marine Terminal complex has nicely paved roads -- and peculiar speed limit signs. All the speeds are marked with peculiar values: 11, 16, 21, 26, 29 miles per hour. The odd signs are part of the terminal's safety program, operating on the theory that the unusual number will force drivers to pay more attention to the speed limits. The tour guides seemed evenly split on the program's effectiveness."

This is in Valdez, Alaska in case you want to see it in person.