MUSIC MONDAYS: WHAT CAMPAIGN SONGS SAY ABOUT YOU

On Saturday as I watched Joe Biden's introduction to the Obama ticket, I was rather appalled by the entry music. Not sure what it was. Either modern day Pearl Jam or some Pearl Jam clone like Nixon. Remember them? Either way, weak shit. Sort of like every time I listen to Rumours and have to skip over "Don't Stop." Are campaign songs intrinsically bad or are they forever tainted by their association with politics. Yes I love Bill Clinton (not as much as I did before the South Carolina debacle, but still a good amount), but it doesn't matter. A politician is a politician.

In honor of these fun thoughts, I'm going to throw some hypothetical campaign songs out there and try to use my psychologist magnifying glass to prognotize what type of politician could one day use this song as a campaign anthem.

SIR MIX-A-LOT: BABY GOT BACK

This could be a good one for a redeemed politician. Someone who had a major downfall, and then bounces BACK onto the scene. John Edwards or Tom Delay. It could work for Dem or GOP in that sense. You'd be surprised by how popular this song still is. The other day I saw a homeless man sitting outside Ralph singing it at the top of his lungs.


DREAMWEAVER

Now this would be a pretty good Obama song. Well maybe not. The McCain editing team could just have a little voice say "Pipe" every time he sings "Dreamweaver." I guess that would happen no matter candidate used it. But if editing didn't exist, this could be a good one.

SEXUAL HEALING

Hmmm... Not sure what type of candidate would have this song. Definitely not a Republican since they hate sex unless a baby is made in the process. And a Democrat wouldn't want to completely alienate good liberal people who've taken vows of chastity. Maybe Ralph Nader could use this one. Nader prancing on stage, balls hanging out, maybe a leather mask... I'm sorry, I'm sorry.


GASOLINA

Well Daddy Yankee endorsed McCain today so maybe. McCain even quoted the song, probably not realizing what "gasolina" really meant. (semen, right?)

THE STAR-SPANGLED BANNER

Is this allowed? Maybe if the candidate sang it himself or herself and that was the campaign song? It would be annoying. Like if you picked a William Hung song. Not that William Hung had any of his own songs. Maybe he could sing the star spangled banner.

OOOH... I'm watching convention coverage right now. The band at the convention is pretty good. They have a 9 year old singing Alycia Keys and now they're doing RESPECT... Maybe there's still hope for the campaign and music. I know Obama's a Wilco fan. Now with Biden on the ticket they may have to give it up for some of those famous Delaware musicians... Hmmm I can't think of a single artist from Delaware.... Actually that's not entirely true. Bob Marley spent a formative year or two in Wilmington, DE.

Now I open up the floor... Pick a campaign song for Obama and McCain... and defend your decision! I'm sure they already have official songs but it's early, they can always change.